“Tribute in Light” by Ludovic Berton used under CC License

Yesterday was a day of reflection for me, remembering memories and feelings from 15 years ago. The attacks on 9/11 punctuated my soul and heart, and in moving through all of that, I re-found this post I did. The desire to love still speaks to me even though I recognize the naivety of my younger self. I am still moved.

I hope it is moving for you too.

I Don’t Want To Be Okay

I don’t want to feel better about the world or myself after September 11^th.  I don’t want to go back to my “normal” routine as a passive player in the world…my job, my daily commute…my armchair perspective of the world.

I don’t want to be okay because I am being told that I should “go back to normal.”  I feel like I am being told to forget and pretend that everything is all right.  Too much is still wrong; it is still too painful for me to just ignore.

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Photo Credit to Noee

I am flying home after co-facilitating a three day intensive institute on equity and justice sponsored by the multicultural student center at the University of Wisconsin Madison. It was a wonderful and deeply transformative three days with some faculty, staff, and students. I am returning home renewed, rejuvenated, and with a clearer sense of purpose of the work I need to do in the world.

Three days together was a gift. Most trainings are 1/2 or full days—two days if we are lucky. It was a rare treat for me and my co-facilitator, Tanya Williams, and it was a deep investment by the institution in its employees.

What I realized is that this additional day allowed us to work in liberation. Trainings and institutes that are smaller timeframes generally only provide opportunities to understand how we internalize and act out of domination and subordination, but not begin to dismantle it. The third day offered us time to explore what liberation from oppression might look and feel like.

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